OK. So the truth is that moving across the country and diving into a new real estate market (while very interesting and exciting) has been a huge blow to my confidence. I recently labeled myself "The Village Idiot." Nothing is familiar. I actually got lost one night coming home from the grocery store which is by the way less than a mile away. The homes are all so different - strange styles that aren't clear to me. For example, what is the difference between a dutch colonial and a colonial home [pictured above]? I think I know - but even now, I am not certain. Just found out today what a cape cod really is. I have been so off my game here that I literally have had trouble discerning which direction I am heading on most roads - N, S, E or W? They all twist and turn and go over hill and dale!
[DUTCH Colonial below]
AND REAL ESTATE...oh my God. Everything seems different. I just found out today that seller's do not pay for title insurance at all! The buyer pays for both policies. The disclosures are weird. There are two types of contracts - a jurisdictional contract and MRIS (same as MLS) contract. I'm still not sure when you use one or the other or both. All escrows are run through attorneys and no one calls it "closing" but rather "settlement." Buyers and sellers BOTH attend "settlement" which is an actual meeting in the escrow office wherein both parties sign their documents at the same time, argue out any last issues and agents attend and are provided their commission checks on the spot as sellers also receive their net distributions then too. These differences are just the TIP of the iceberg.
So I charged off to Maryland from Seattle ready to jump in with both feet and kick butt and take names. Instead I got lost, tripped and fell on my face and may have chipped my confidence tooth permanently in the process!
So I have been beating myself up a bit with being down, frustrated and wondering why I can't seem to compete. EVERYONE ELSE has the HOME FIELD ADVANTAGE - even the newest agent! Then while unpacking one last box today I came across a book, "Smart Talk" by Lou Tice. By some strange chance I flip through the pages quickly and notice one word - homesick. It struck a chord. I returned to the page and began reading (for those who have the book the passage begins on page 218). It was an awakening. What I am experiencing is normal! Imagine that! He states that certain signals tell you when you are out of your comfort zone. Your memory gets blocked. (TRUE! How the hell do I get home from the grocery store?!) You suddenly become awkward, clumsy, accident-prone...(TRUE AGAIN and embarrassing I might add!). You feel tense...your blood pressure rises, your vocal chords tighten and make your voice sound funny (May explain my first client interview...UGH!).
We are wired to stay with the familiar in life - to remain comfortable. But it is only through change and expanding our minds that we can truly grow. Sometimes however that process can be uncomfortable and downright painful. Lou says that your subconscious says, "Don't go and [make a fool of yourself in an uncomfortable environment]. You'll blow it! Stay with the familiar. Stay where you belong. Stay with who you know. Don't try to expand."
So how do I make this unfamiliar, uncomfortable environment my new normal and even better - GROW in a positive way from this experience? Here's what Lou suggests:
1. Visualize and imprint the new situation in your mind as the way things are supposed to be. You create a venturesome spirit and take yourself safely to the next situation or level.
2. Challenge what you know as the way things are supposed to be. (Great example on page 225.) When you change the way you think, you change your life.
3. When you screw up, laugh about it and move on. You build resiliency and keep your ideas burning inside.
The reason I share all of this is that we are ALL EXPERIENCING a new environment as real estate professionals with bailouts and credit crunches, etc. Even seasoned veterans are seeing changes that are unprecedented. They have a better advantage having had to adjust to changes in the past but not everyone is able to work through these market changes & keep a positive outlook. But if we visualize our success, challenge our old way of thinking about how things are "supposed to be" and don't beat ourselves up when we have difficulties, we can exponentially grow through the process and emerge stronger, better and more resilient.
OK. So I have decided that today I am giving myself the home field advantage. This IS my new normal and I can see myself succeeding and producing, etc., etc., etc. How about you?
So I charged off to Maryland from Seattle ready to jump in with both feet and kick butt and take names. Instead I got lost, tripped and fell on my face and may have chipped my confidence tooth permanently in the process!
So I have been beating myself up a bit with being down, frustrated and wondering why I can't seem to compete. EVERYONE ELSE has the HOME FIELD ADVANTAGE - even the newest agent! Then while unpacking one last box today I came across a book, "Smart Talk" by Lou Tice. By some strange chance I flip through the pages quickly and notice one word - homesick. It struck a chord. I returned to the page and began reading (for those who have the book the passage begins on page 218). It was an awakening. What I am experiencing is normal! Imagine that! He states that certain signals tell you when you are out of your comfort zone. Your memory gets blocked. (TRUE! How the hell do I get home from the grocery store?!) You suddenly become awkward, clumsy, accident-prone...(TRUE AGAIN and embarrassing I might add!). You feel tense...your blood pressure rises, your vocal chords tighten and make your voice sound funny (May explain my first client interview...UGH!).
We are wired to stay with the familiar in life - to remain comfortable. But it is only through change and expanding our minds that we can truly grow. Sometimes however that process can be uncomfortable and downright painful. Lou says that your subconscious says, "Don't go and [make a fool of yourself in an uncomfortable environment]. You'll blow it! Stay with the familiar. Stay where you belong. Stay with who you know. Don't try to expand."
So how do I make this unfamiliar, uncomfortable environment my new normal and even better - GROW in a positive way from this experience? Here's what Lou suggests:
1. Visualize and imprint the new situation in your mind as the way things are supposed to be. You create a venturesome spirit and take yourself safely to the next situation or level.
2. Challenge what you know as the way things are supposed to be. (Great example on page 225.) When you change the way you think, you change your life.
3. When you screw up, laugh about it and move on. You build resiliency and keep your ideas burning inside.
The reason I share all of this is that we are ALL EXPERIENCING a new environment as real estate professionals with bailouts and credit crunches, etc. Even seasoned veterans are seeing changes that are unprecedented. They have a better advantage having had to adjust to changes in the past but not everyone is able to work through these market changes & keep a positive outlook. But if we visualize our success, challenge our old way of thinking about how things are "supposed to be" and don't beat ourselves up when we have difficulties, we can exponentially grow through the process and emerge stronger, better and more resilient.
OK. So I have decided that today I am giving myself the home field advantage. This IS my new normal and I can see myself succeeding and producing, etc., etc., etc. How about you?
Posts
Oh Amy, I loved this post. Though it made me sad because I just realized that I loaned out my copy of Smart Talk and I don't know who has it. I must get it back!!! :-)
ReplyDeleteI know you are going to be a great success. Good luck on those "settlements".
Hi Amy, I just loved your blog! Thanks so much for sharing - I had wondered how your move to the "east" had gone. You are great!
ReplyDeleteAmy, thank you for your thoughtful and revealing comments! I intend to get that book--from the library! As you know, I heard Lou Tice at the GU alumni meeting and can imagine him describing things as you relate. I can certainly relate to the awkwardness and uncertainty that accompanies a new endeavor (being a new RE agent) as you can appreciate from the Buffini class. I am growing to understand that experienced agents, too, are experiencing uncertainty in this market which makes me feel like I have company!
ReplyDeleteIt is very easy for me to see you succeeding in your new home. You have all that is needed and much more to quickly own the home field advantage. Go for it!
Amy, great stuff! And so honest, just like you! I know your new home and homefield will be incredible for you, once you know where the "shortcuts home" are (I mean, once you get the lay of the land enough to know HOW & WHERE to best spend your time, and be most efficient as you build your new reality). I would just make sure you spend good time investing in true Referral partner relationships; saddle up next to folks who AREN'T new-comers to that area, but who maybe have been, who can show you around, get you connected, and launch your new business into the stratosphere! And keep hitting those number, right?! (says the pot to the kettle) And keep writing, what a great way to keep in touch, and "process". All the best, Andy
ReplyDeleteHang in there, Chip! I know how you thrive when challenged! Happy (belated) Birthday! I sent you a text, did you get it? Anyway, I'll call you sometime this weekend. If your phone rings at midnight, you'll know it's me forgetting about our time difference!
ReplyDeletePeace!
~c
I know of no one better equipped than you to overcome any obstacles. Just think how well-versed you'll be in both western and eastern versions of the practice of real estate. Knowing you, you'll probably take all this experience and catapult yourself into a position with the NAR or somewhere where a broad perspective in real estate would give you an advantage!
ReplyDeleteBut truly, the main advantage you have right this minute is that you have the smarts, the people skills, and years of Buffini coaching to knock anybody's sock off. The rest is just details....
Debra G